The Gray Area

So I'm sitting in journalism class, trying to finish my verse over the "Move On" beat (which by the way, is one of the best songs in recent memory). Anyone else think the death penalty is archaic?

1. I write a lot. Mostly music, but my math notebook also has essays about stuff like welfare reform, affirmative action and stuff like that.

2. I don't do as well in school as I should. I don't think grades are an accurate indicator of intelligence.

3. I know this is wrong, but I resent people who I consider unintelligent but get good grades through superficial means. It's dilligence, but it still bugs me.

4. I think I have excellent social skills, and I can be a very social person. I deal well with different kinds of people.

5. That said, there are lots of times when being alone seems far better than being with anyone, even people I really enjoy.

6. I would describe myself as an idealistic cynic. Around some people I seem somewhat carefree, but if you know me better you know that injustices really bother me, and I think the world can be a better place. But, like I said, I can be very cynical as well.

7. Yes, I enjoy running. That's probably why I see a psychologist.

8. I really, really love hip hop. Most people wouldn't understand it, but it's more than just a music; it's a culture, and above all a state of mind. I think about, listen to, talk about and write music all the time.

9. When I say I love hip hop...if you complain about the rap you hear on the radio now, I'll be the first person to agree with you. I don't say that to be a pretentious elitist, I just think there needs to be more differentiation within the genre.

10. I love New York City. I would very much like to go to college there, but I can almost guarantee that at some point I'm going to live there.

11. It sounds cliche, but although I'm friends with a lot of people there are really only a few who know me well, and they know who they are.

12. I'm one of the most 'liberal' people you'll ever meet. The labels Americans use are sometimes misnomers, but I think that's pretty accurate.

13. I think patriotism is a farce. I'm all for unity with people and groups about which you care, but blind faith in one's government for the simple fact that it's their place of birth is ignorant, and often dangerous.

14. I love The Office. Lots of my favorite movies are comedies. I love really cryptic, complicated, intellectual art, but I think sometimes humor can be the most intelligent form of expression.

15. On that note, I honestly think South Park has been the most honest form of societal commentary in the last decade.

16. The internet is the worst thing to ever happen to the music industry, but the best thing to ever happen to music.

17. I'm better friends now with a few people who graduated than I was with them while they were in high school. That's pretty cool.

18. I'm an atheist. That term has a ridiculously negative connotation in America, and honestly speaking I find that amusing. Most of my friends are theists, so I don't want to get into my reasoning so as not to offend anyone, but I study religion when I can. I find it fascinating.

19. I find it extremely offensive when it's suggested that one can't be moral without being religious. I care deeply about people around the world. I volunteer, I give money to homeless people, and I know I could never kill someone. I find it ironic that the "Christian right" opposes me on so many of those points.

20. I find it ridiculous when people label themselves as "pro-life," because those same people generally support hunting and war, and oppose healthcare and social welfare. You aren't "pro-life," you just don't like abortion.

21. I internalize everything, but I'm getting better at it. Since I was diagnosed with depression, I channel my thoughts better, probably because I'm more conscious of them.

22. Lots of things affect me every day, usually indirectly. For example, the whole situation in eastern Africa will consume me some days. And it's not the same way it consumes armchair activists with blogspot addresses; it's a general feeling of helplessness. Yes, it's fun haha.

23. I don't trust people. I know how cliche that sounds, but it's true. I don't open up to many people, and it doesn't always work when I do.

24. I'm a hopeless perfectionist at times. Tim can tell you that; I'll write stuff that's really good up to a certain point, and if I mess up one line I start over instead of fixing it.

25. The reason I like to talk so much is because internal dialogues make me anxious. I hate the idea of holding thoughts in my head with no notion as to its validity. That's not to say I'm influenced by how other people react to what I think; I just need to say things for myself to hear them.

As the year draws to a close, it's time to look toward 2009 and what it has to offer in the department of new music. Here's a look at some of the more exciting projects slated to drop next year.

The Clipse: Till the Casket Drops
After their impressive mixtape, the followup to Hell Hath No Fury looks to be another masterpiece of the coke-rap genre they turned on its ear. Malice and Pusha T are two of the more reliable lyricists out at this time, and the album is unlikely to disappoint.

Jay-Z: The Blueprint 3
Rumored to be produced almost exclusively by Kanye West, Jay's third post-retirement album will be a strong one if "History" with Tony Williams is any indication. Should be out in the first part of the year.

Joe Budden: Padded Room
What would a Joe Budden album be without a pushback? Originally slated for an October release, Joey's second proper album (to be released on Amalgam Digital) seems to have the potential to be terrific, judging by Budden's descriptions of and enthusiasm about the tracks, most of which have been done for quite some time now. It drops in February.

Royce da 5'9": Street Hop
Most probably thought Royce's next full length would be out by now. Although Bar Exam 2 was largely disappointing to some, this project could have potential if he raps like he did on his more impressive tracks this year.

Charles Hamilton: TBA
After hearing The Pink Lavalamp, it seems we have every reason to believe Hamilton is capable of dropping an incredible debut. Here's hoping he outsells Soulja Boy.

Kno & Tonedeff: Chico & the Man
The underground's Detox; this seriously has the potential to be one of the greatest rap albums ever created. QN5 is notorious for taking forever to drop material, but this should make it worth the wait.

Mos Def: The Ecstatic
The single ("Life in Marvelous Times") indicates a return to the Mos we all know and love. Should be an impressive album, and a comeback of sorts.

Lupe Fiasco: Everywhere
LupEND is to be released as three discs, subtitled Everywhere, Nowhere, and Down Here. The discs will be released separately. If Lupe's album is anywhere close to the quality of his first two, he'll run away with album of the year honors.

Dr. Dre: Detox
Dr. Dre's third album...nevermind. I cracked up already.

Charles needs to take responsibility for what happened. If it was his management's decision to release The Pink Lavalamp exclusively through Thisis50, which I'm inclined to believe it was, then he should still own up to it, as he should be proactive in making sure he knows what's happening with his own music. Were he to come out on his blog and sincerely apologize to the blogs that helped make him and maybe do some exclusives for them or something, everything would be right in the world. Defiance in this situation will get him nowhere.

That said, I see where he's coming from. He's on Interscope and was apparently assured that Thisis50 could do big things for his album. I get that. He's young, and his management seems to have been very competent up until this point. The only real issue here is his now-strained relationship with the blogs.

DOWNLOAD

From Charles Hamilton's blog:


"This is what y'all been waitin on, ain't it?"
-Kanye West, "Barry Bonds"

To all the intergalactic leaders, December 9th is the day. If my time on earth is cut short because of this release, fine. I feel as though I was born to make this album, and I chose to accept the mission of releasing it when I felt the time was right. Whether I would make a profit off it or not. I would love to see some $ from toiling to do this album.

"What is this album about? What's the story behind it?"

Well let me take you track-by-track through...

The Pink Lavalamp.

MUSIC

I have always said that I am music. Granted that's a phrase that everyone uses, and they have a right to. Even Lil Wayne tattooed it above his eyes. But for me, music is more than just a means of making money. It's not even a means of art. It's my way of communicating. My way of thinking. My way of living. I would still be the outcast to ALL OF YOU (execs, fans, friends, family, EVERYONE) if it weren't for the musical ability I've been divinely blessed with by HER (points up to the sky, and glares with red eyes at everyone who's made fun of my theory on God's gender).

The first verse I wrote sober at my ex lover's church. Second verse I wrote at my mother's house, while high on weed. Third verse... hear it for yourself...

LOSER

At the time, no one, not even some of my friends, wanted to give me credit for my lyrical ability. Even in some of the "battles" I was in, I would lose because they didn't get my bars. Beyond that, I was always called a loser growing up. I was the kid who wore Payless Sonic the Hedgehog sneakers, could impersonate anything I saw on TV, played piano and had HORRIBLE luck with women. To me, this song can tell the future. Because, hey... "Now my buzz is off the chain..."

SHE'S SO HIGH

I was talking about the sample ("Breathe", Telepopmusik), a girl I used to make love to while on smack, and God. That's pretty much the concept of the album. Is it love? Is it the love music? Do drugs bring me closer to my love of music? Do I love drugs more than I love God. Do I love myself? Does the music come from me? I guess all the doubt comes from the

VOICES

I hear voices in my head, to this day. I hear clocks ticking. I hear old and new rivals laughing. I see horrible visions of people's faces disfigured. And it all comes from my perception of people on the surface. This song is my way of talking back to the voices in my head. I think I should listen to it now. They are coming back pretty strong... I just wink at them... let them feel comfortable as ambient noises as I go through my day-to-day...

BOY WHO CRIED WOLF

No one ever wants to believe me about anything. No one wanted to believe me when I made Sonic the Hamilton. No one believed I could get a deal. No one believed I'd make it past 18. I myself didn't believe I could make it past 13, as many suicide attempts I got under my belt. And let's not forget about the almost overdose days. Yo HchO. Remember AM Studios?

LET ME LIVE (feat. Bagdad)

It was like a dream come true to work with Bagdad. In high school, he was the coolest n1gga. And since I was using the studio in the high school, I always dreampt of working with him. Sounds cheesy, but whatever... at that point in my life, I just wanted to be happy, and he lives his life very carefree... and I admired that.

BRIGHTER DAYS

Despite my self-constructed hell, I knew brighter days were coming. And by the way, I hate church. Any system of which they tell you what's right and wrong based on loosely-translated text is wrong. Especially when the person giving the teachings is as guilty as the sinners he's preaching to.

Eat a d1ck, Pastor whoever...

THE COOKOUT

I actually shot up in the booth when I recorded it. I can't remember if it was a written or a freestyle. But the bars are probably the hardest I spit in that time. Still can't listen to it without twitching...

SAT(T)ELITE

My love song to... who and whatever I was in love with at the time (yellow?).

LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST (feat. Yung Nate)

Nate and I had a HUGE falling out around this time. We were once in a duo. Honestly, we're the reason why Kids in the Hall and Cool Kids have a floor to stand on. I thank the bum ass A&R who refused to sign us because (we weren't ready) for inspiring other labels to concoct replicas of us. Obviously we're on good terms now, but we weren't then. This is one of the songs that was supposed to be on our album "Welcome to the Jungle".

Will that be the next joint to come out the stash?

COME BACK TO YOU

I put myself in a poisonous relationship in which I vowed I will never leave. I left. And how empty do I feel today? I don't know. You tell me...

LATTE

The night before I wrote this song, I shot the biggest dose of heroin. I was watching this episode of "Behind the Music" with Motley Crue, and I heard Nikki Syxx say that he quit the habit after he did that. So I tried it. And everything I saw in my dream, I woke up and wrote about it.

And it all started with having a latte with HchO.

SHININ'

My suicide letter. 'Nuff said. HchO is the only reason I didn't do it, because as I was leaving the FDA studio to end it all, he walked in. I played him the record, he played it for mad people, and it became the favorite around the school studio.

So much for me killing myself.

I'LL BE AROUND (outro)

I'll let you hear it. "I'll Be Around" is my favorite Spinners song, and it's how I say goodbye to close friends...

WRITING IN THE SKY (bonus)

The day I found out God was a woman. Because I was looking her dead in the eyes as I wrote this. And I was sober.

She loves me. And I love her. And I still got one more wish... I hope it's granted to me (tuck your girl, n1gga...)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So there you have it. The story of The Pink Lavalamp. Come out to the event on December 8th to hear the FULL story, including names of people and vivid situations. I'm thankful for EVERYONE who's played a role in this journey in my life.

-HchO, for being a lifesaver, a father figure, a friend, a brother, and a real n1gga...

-The Moorer/Hamilton family, for giving me the right mix of insantiy and intelligence to formulate who I REALLY am...

-Every ex-girlfriend/female hater of Charles Hamilton, for making me a better, more compatible man. Thought I'm still a "womanizer" in the eyes of some, I'm just a guy who loves the opposite sex so much that it's only trumped by my love for music.

-THE HAMILTON ADMINISTRATION, for being hard-nosed about my success in this industry.

-Kanye West, for listening to my music and being honest. He dug it, by the way...

-Pharrell, for being the first celebrity ass n1gga to big me up...

-Every rapper, producer, radio personality, EVERYONE who's bigged me up.

-EVERYONE THAT HATED ON ME AT ANY GIVEN POINT IN TIME!!!!!!

Thank you all for being cool. And of course...

THE FANS.

I LOVE YOU GUYS MORE THAN YOU WILL EVER KNOW!!!!!! My abscence is to come back to you guys a better person. Love you guys more. Make sure that I don't turn into the kind of guy that doesn't blog on the regular. So please please please stay loyal/down/cool wit me. When I come back, there's no taking me from you.

BELIEVE THAT.

I'm very excited by the release of this... and I'm excited to see the response on The Pink Lavalamp.

At the conclusion of The Hamiltonization Process, I'm still gonna be doing music. So I am setting an email list of people who really wanna hear my music. Only those on the mailing list will receive the music... if you want it, hit me up at

charleshamiltoniscool@gmail.com

All those people will be informed of the new music, be it a song or a project... so like, yeah... add that email addy to your contact list...

I love you all... I will see ALL of you when Charles Hamilton becomes Charles Hamilton.

Truly and sincerely yours,

Charles

You know what it is. Everyone probably knows Jay-Z was born on this day, but so was Masta Ace, also from Brooklyn. Definitely a great day for hip hop.

I figured everyone would be posting "December 4th," so here's a classic track from each.

A lot of you may hate me for this, but I have some things to say.

On Rapbasement, there's a discussion about unpopular opinions in hip hop. Some of the statements resulted in heated arguments where everyone involved seemed to be genuinely offended by the opposing parties. But why would the opinions of strangers on the internet illicit such violent reactions?

My guess is that it has to do with the nature of the subject. More so than any other genre of music, hip hop is a culture and identifies itself as one. When someone criticizes a rapper they do more than just that; they criticize everything they stand for and everyone with whom they're affiliated. Why do you think the East coast-West coast beef reached such a boiling point? Snoop Dogg didn't have to step on New York in that video; he'd already done it.

The bottom line is, certain opinions are considered heresy in hip hop. It's certainly good that there is a consensual respect for certain people: I don't think Run-DMC is the best group ever, but I wouldn't criticize them because if it wasn't for them, I might not be writing this today. However, I think the gag order on some topics should be lifted. Anyway, here are some of my more unpopular opinions on hip hop, take them for what they are. They might be unpopular in mainstream society, on the internet, or with certain groups of people. Of course, I'd love to hear yours as well.

*LL Cool J is terrible. It doesn't matter that he's considered a legend; he isn't and never has been an above-average rapper.

*Hip Hop is Dead... is Nas's second best album; considerably better than Stillmatic, which is not in his top five.

*Timbaland is boring and uninventive.

*Like I've mentioned before, All Eyez on Me and Life After Death were not that good.

*Biggie was a nice emcee, nothing more.

*Tupac ruined his legacy with his post-conviction ignorant gangsta complex.

*Lupe Fiasco is the best rapper to ever live.

*The South is possibly the best region for music over the last several years. It's just grossly misrepresented in the mainstream.

*Speaking of being misrepresented in the mainstream, when people today say they think rap is awful, I can't blame them based on what's popular. It's just a shame they don't dig deeper, and a bigger shame that Plies is rich and Masai works at Staples to put himself through school haha.

*Speaking of Masai, Almost Gone is one of my top five albums of all time. Download it.

*I find very few redeeming qualities in T.I.

*Kanye West is a genius, and an excellent lyricist. People just have a preconceived notion of him as a 'producer-rapper.'

*KRS-One is grossly overrated and needs to decide if he wants to be pretentious or do more interviews with Soulja Boy.

*Snoop Dogg, while being one of my favortie celebrities, makes awful albums.

*Fuck what anyone says, I will buy any Will Smith record hahaha.

*DOC's No One Can Do it Better is brilliant and probably the best West coast mainstream album.

*Jay-Z's second verse on "Blueprint 2" won the beef with Nas.

*Tonedeff is the most vocally-talented rapper ever.

*Bone Thugz N Harmony are ridiculously boring and lazy.

*Sticky Fingaz had the best verse on The Marshall Mathers LP.

*'Swagger' is slang for 'I can't rap.'

*Masta Ace is the best rapper born on December 4th.

*The Black Album is far better than The Blueprint, although the latter had some of the best beats ever made.




*If you think hip hop is dead, you're just looking in the wrong places.


More to come at a later date. Peace